Author – Jim (Amy will comment later once her life is less hectic)

This blog is an opportunity to write my rants about the restaurant industry in general. It is a chance to get all my complaints about the poor decisions restaurant owners make on one page, so maybe I can minimize them in actual reveiws. This is somewhat of a spouting off, so forgive me. You have to understand one disclaimer: you may read a rant and associate with a Madison restaurant. Please do not then assume I am painting that restaurant in a completely negative light. These rants are only part of the big picture. So without further ado, here is why your favorite restaurant may suck.

1.  The waitstaff writes their name on the table with a crayon when they first come to your table.

2. They have to explain why they are pouring olive oil on a plate  when presenting the bread.

3. You can easily see into a very disorganized, messy kitchen.

4. There are 4-5 menues for each person to peruse.

5. The water is tepid.

6. The trash can in the bathroom is overflowing with paper towel, or there is no toilet paper or paper towel left.

7. “New york cheesecake” on the dessert menu.

8. “Chicken curry” next to “chicken mole” on the menu. Pick one, maybe two cuisines, and go with it.

9. The words “$ (blank) for shared dishes” on the menu.

10. A gratuity added automatically for parties of only 5 or more.

11. Closing time 9 p.m..

12. The words”no substitutions please” on the menu.

13. An appetizer menu with only fried items.

14. A charge for a bread basket.

15. Beer served in a frosted mug. (You may disagree if you don’t like to taste your beer, or if you like to hold an ice cube in your hand)

16. Wine, or any drink for that matter, poured just millimeters from the top of the glass.

17. Glossy, greasy finger printed menus.

18. Random dusty, kitschy crap as decoration all over the place.

19. Having to move around another laminated marketing cube in order to fit my plate on the table.

20. Menu itmes created or endorsed by Food Network chefs.

21. Surly teenage hostesses texting on their cell phone.

22. A 10 page menu.

23. An add-on possbility for every menu item, “would you like to “load” your fries?” (aren’t they loaded already?)

24. Waitstaff with an obviously soiled apron.

25. A wine list with only one or two producers.